Reverb: The Official UTF Blog

Unless you’ve been living in outer space, Lohan was busted for the second time in approximately two months for DUI and cocaine possession. Those are the exact same charges Lohan had before she went through her second stint at “rehab” at the Promises facility. Nearly two weeks later, she’s allegedly carjacking a white Denali, running over an innocent young man’s foot, and kidnapping two passengers in the vehicle…all of this just to chase after her ex personal assistant. To top it off, she claims the cocaine found in her pocket was not hers (eye roll) and that “I wasn’t driving, the black kid was driving” when officers arrived on the scene. Note that the so-called “black kid” she referred to appears to be of Latin descent yet I digress. The gossip flowing about Lohan has been nothing short of shocking and almost too good to be true yet sadly, it is. It’s a huge tumble down the heights of Hollywood, and Lohan’s career as a starring actress may be nearly extinct.

A few hours ago, I caught the early morning showing for Lindsay Lohan’s flick, “I Know Who Killed Me” for $4.00. I wasn’t about to pay full price for it. I’m sure many of you might wonder why I even bothered. The truth is, I use to be “Li-Lo” fan…before she started partying like it’s 1999 every night of the week. I knew that she had talent after catching her in “Freaky Friday” and felt that if she played her cards right, she could become a player in Hollywood. Obviously, I was wrong. Lohan has had approximately five bombs in a row, with “I Know Who Killed Me” more than likely making it number six. Now, I’d seen the trailer and thought the movie somewhat interesting. The press and hype surrounding her recent arrest did not deter that.

When I arrived at the theater, I knew that the prospects were not going to be good. The showing was in the back of the theater, which is usually reserved for films that will be exiting the theater soon. When I sat down, I counted how many people came inside. There was approximately 20 people in my theater. A few were whispering about Lohan’s recent troubles before the film started, and I gather that some were catching it because they like to watch a train wreck: you know it’s going to happen, but you can’t keep your eyes off of it. I admit that I was in the theater for a bit of that reason as well, but I also genuinely was interested to see Lohan’s new “adult role” that would hopefully transition her out of teen roles. I have to admit that this film did accomplish that. The unfortunate side effect is that “I Know Who…” eerily mirrored Lohan’s life: her past as a “good girl” and her present as a “bad girl.” Throughout the film, I could see shades of the real Lindsay Lohan blatantly glaring at me through her character, a film where art imitated her real life. I could also see that the film – while ripping some elements from the successful Saw franchise – was not bad. Seriously. Yes, I figured out who the killer was halfway through the film. Yes, I also figured out some other sub plots for the movie halfway through the film. That could be because I’m a writer and think about story when I watch film, or they didn’t do a very good job on hiding the “ah hah” factor. If Lohan had not had such bad press over the past two years or so, this film might have allowed some to take her a bit more seriously and that she’s not just a “Disney movie” actress. Unfortunately, “I Know Who…” might be Lohan’s last big screen release.

Out of the current brat pack of Hollywood screw ups, Lohan is at the top of the list. She trumps anything and everything Paris Hilton, Nicole Ritchie, and Britney Spears has done. Many say she’s her generation’s Robert Downey Jr. Even at his worse, he never had the kind of legal problems Lohan potentially faces such as: two counts of DUI, two counts of cocaine possession (a felony for each), one count of taking a controlled substance in a police station, one count of carjacking, two counts of kidnapping, and one count of assault and battery (when she ran over the guy’s foot). I think I may have covered the entire list of potential charges she could face once the District Attorney gets involved. My personal opinion is that if there is enough evidence for a grand jury indictment for all of these charges, then Lohan should be charged with every last one of them. Do I think she’ll face all of those charges? Not bloody likely! She’s in a world where celebrity justice is 26 days in jail (Paris Hilton for one DUI and driving on a suspended license) or four days in jail with three years probation (Nicole Richie for two DUIs). Do I think Lohan should go to jail? Yes, if convicted of her crimes. Do I think she’ll do enough time behind bars if she goes to jail? Not even. Should she get another dose of rehab instead of jail? No way! She hasn’t hit a bottom and is not willing to face the fact that she has a problem. Rehab only works if you realize you’ve had enough of living the sick and twisted version of your life. I don’t think Lohan’s there yet. That being said, I don’t want to wake up one morning and read that Lohan was found dead in her home or a club of an apparent overdose. I don’t relish and take delight in people’s problems. I wish Lohan would seek the help she needs and really commit to it. Since rehab is not working, jail is the only option; it dried out Robert Downey Jr. before he killed himself with drugs.

Even if Lohan manages to straighten out her legal problems, I truly believe the major Hollywood studios will not touch her. She’s box office kryptonite and hard to insure when it comes to backers – the people with the money. If she manages to get cast in major, feature films again, she’ll have to cover her own insurance like Robert Downey Jr. did. With a few pending lawsuits nipping at her heels, I am unsure that will be possible. There’s no way to tell how much money she’s blown through, how much she has right now, and how much she’ll have left after paying for her (more than likely) very expensive defense attorney. While you should never say never, I predict that straight-to-video movies and TV movies (Lifetime) will be her only avenues as an actress. Hollywood is a very fickle place, and I predict that she’s burned her bridges in the road called stardom and fame.

Note: I realize that title is probably being used all over the net, but it’s very appropriate considering all that’s happened.